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I liked your poem, specially because it really showed tender between the characters in love. I really showed a normal perspective that any good writer has when he looks through the window.
But on my opinion you could put more... "description", use more adjectives.
I liked this poem because you transport the warm feeling inside that room, to the reader, and the cold feeling of the streets where it is snowing... I can feel it too like stucking my nose into the glass of the window and seeing the out side.
So keep up the good work. Hope that you can find a way to improve your work even much through my critique. =)
The Artist thought this was FAIR
14 out of 14 deviants thought this was fair.


WordOfChen Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you for enjoying this piece. I wanted to leave out a lot of the description because it made the poem feel cluttered, but regardless it could also be done in a more description oriented manner. Thank you for enjoying it :3

-Captain Chenbeard of the Black Fedora Pirates :iconwordofchen:
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